Colorado Bucket List

I never understood the phrase “bucket list,” until I realized that it is a list of things you want to do before you “kick the bucket.” Yuck. This list has nothing to do with dying. It’s mostly a list of things that I’d like to do before I stop living in Colorado, which will happen when I go to grad school, when Taylor Swift finally agrees to marry me, or Martha Stewart decides that I should be the heir to her decorating throne. Until that happens, here is a list of things that I want to do.

South Park-Related:

  • Go to Casa Bonita – See cliff divers. Don’t invite my friend Cartman.
  • Go to the South Park area of Colorado.
  • Go to Fairplay, Colorado, the town that South Park was based on. On the trip, refer to the town as “Foreplay.” Stop at a gas station and ask for directions to “Foreplay.” When I arrive in Fairplay, ask someone for their recommendation for places to eat in “Foreplay.”

Outdoor Adventure-Related (Since being the least adventurous person in Boulder no longer makes me “cute” and “unusual”):

  • Go rock climbing inside
  • Go rock climbing outside
  • Go downhill skiing.
  • Go horseback riding (because my palmist told me to!)
  • Not seriously injure myself going rock climbing or skiing
  • Go camping
  • Go camping with food other than Doritos and a 30-rack of PBR
  • Run the Boulder Bolder
  • Climb a Fourteener
  • See an elk
  • See a rattlesnake

Non-Potentially Life-Threatening Activities:

  • Camp at Lyons Folksfest
  • Tour the New Belgian Brewery in Fort Collins
  • Go to my college roommate’s cousin’s pie shop in Fort Collins “Me Oh My! Coffee and Pie”
  • Play music on Pearl St.
  • Play a gig in Denver
  • Go “to the mountains”
  • Familiarize self with Colorado wildflowers
  • Get invited to a neighborhood cookout/party
  • Befriend a baby


  • Go to a Rockies Game
  • Understand the difference between “LoDo,” “LoHi,” etc.
  • Go to the dog park that is also a beer garden
  • Go to the Grizzly Rose
  • Go to the Grizzly Rose Again
  • Go square dancing
  • Be in a band based out of Denver
  • Go to a rodeo
  • Go to another rodeo so I can say “This ain’t my first rodeo.”

Neighboring States:

  • Go to New Mexico
  • Breaking Bad Tour of Albuquerque
  • Go to Wyoming
  • Go to Spiral Jetty on the Great Salt Lake
  • Go on a stupidly long road trip to LA to get a beer with Elizabeth Aubert
  • Go to Idaho
  • Go to Montana

Okay, now I’m gonna get cracking!


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