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Fighting the Good Fight

I like to think that I have a fairly healthy body image. I also do yoga or run 4-5 times a week, eat healthily and have a body that is able to develop muscle fairly quickly. I acknowledge that most people who know me and have seen me in the past 3-4 years would be […]

A Janney Lockman Living Wedding Season Survival Guide

Whether you’re booked every weekend through October or it’s only a cousin or two getting hitched, wedding season is upon us! As a seasoned wedding guest, I’ve developed some strategies over the years that can make this awkward time full of strangers’ relatives a season of celebration. 1. Wedding Buddy: If you don’t know many […]

An Encounter At Trader Joe’s

“Can I help you find anything today?” Janey looked up. The incredibly handsome man standing in front of her was what her grandma would call “a tall drink of water.” Popping out of the top of his orange Hawaiian shirt was a swath of thick, black chest hair. His blue eyes pierced into the depths […]

Ground Rules For Moving

When I travel, I like to imagine myself moving to the places I am visiting. Usually, it has no basis in reality, but now that I have no job or significant other tying myself to Denver, it feels like this wedding trip and tour could potentially result in a move. Having moved hastily before, I […]

Colorado Bucket List Update 2016

I wrote this Colorado Bucket List in 2014. How are we doin’ here? Commentary in italics. South Park-Related: Okay, seriously, I need to go to Casa Bonita.  Go to Casa Bonita – See cliff divers. Don’t invite my friend Cartman. Go to the South Park area of Colorado (What does this even mean, 2014 self?) […]

Suburban Man with Large Pick-up Truck Has A Huge Penis, No, Really

Thornton – Colorado. Area man who drives a Ford Super Crew F-450 XL claims that he has a “freaky huge” penis. 28 year-old suburbanite, Bradley Morris not only drives a vehicle that is frankly baffling given his lifestyle, but is also allegedly hung. “My truck has a 6.7 L Powerstroke V8 TurboDiesel engine. That’s how […]

RTD Advocacy Alert – RTD Riders & EcoPass Recipients – Please Read!

I promise not to spam y’all with work-related things too often, but as several of you heard me ranting about this weekend, RTD is going to have a pretty big vote coming up that would raise the price of EcoPasses, for businesses and for neighborhoods by 18.3% starting in 2016. If you were not already […]